Two blogs in less than 24 hours? What is going on?
Anyway I don't know what to do. I need some advice and input. Real input and advice. Not just people saying to pray about something. I need logic right now to help me make my choice.
I'm about 16-30 credits shy of graduating with an associates degree. The problem is I don't know what I want my major to be. I've switched it about 50 gazillion times. First it was Theatre, then Music, then Interior Design, then Psychology, then I flirted with the idea of Surgical Tech before quickly switching back to Psychology, and then Speech because I only need 2 more Speech classes to finish my degree in addition to my other course work. I still need to take Comp II, a lab science, and a math class (which math class I need depends on which degree I choose). I already have enough credits to have an associates degree, but none of them combine to make an actual degree.
Even though my Speech degree is closest to being complete I cannot take the last 2 classes I need online so I cannot finish next semester because I don't have anyone to watch my kids while I go to classes during the day (even though it would only be for a few hours a week).
And mostly I'm stalling. I miss the arts. I love psychology and neuroscience but the cost of completing a Ph.D. or a PsyD is staggering, especially since TU is the only local place I could attend for that. And a psychology bachelor's degree is not going to get me much.
I've flirted with going to medical school. I would have to become a surgeon because that is what interests me. I don't want to be heavily involved in patient care... I just think it's awesome to be able to cut someone open and fix their insides. Or possible I'd be a plastic surgeon because it combines art and science quite well. The main problem is I don't think I want to slave away at school that long. Even if I got my butt in gear and finished my bachelor's in two years and immediately got accepted into medical school (and could somehow pay for it all) I'd then have a good 5-7 years for residency and any fellowships so I wouldn't even start to really recoup money for student loans for 11-13 years. I'd most likely be in my 40's and my kids would be about to graduate from high school. And residency would mean lots of time away from home until I was able to work in a non-emergency/trauma setting that didn't require being on call to perform surgery in the middle of the night.
I've thought about law school but if I can't be Matlock or Perry Mason I don't want to do it. I don't want to prosecute for fear of prosecuting someone who is innocent and I don't want to defend for fear of someone guilty getting off scot-free.
And even though I'd love interior design, it doesn't have a steady income and you can barely make any money doing design in Tulsa. I know a designer who made $13,000 one year... that definitely wouldn't cover my expenses in gas, a home office, child care etc.
The surgical tech program would only take 9 months, but then I'm face with the child care issue again.
The problem is I really want a degree and I don't really care what it is in as long as I can be creative in the future, even if my job isn't creative... but I need to be able to afford the degree.
I don't know what to do.
Saturday, December 10, 2011
Friday, December 09, 2011
Dainty as an elephant...
This has been a crazy summer and fall. This summer we finally got Maeve into occupational therapy and speech therapy, as well as behavioral therapy and some physical therapy (though that is on hold right now as her physical therapist had a stroke and retired but someone new is starting at the beginning of January).
With Maeve's extreme anxiety we decided it would be best to have Tripp there with her initially... her therapist recommended that we have him evaluated as well. Turns out he definitely needed speech and also needed occupational therapy as well. Then I started noticing how hyper and out of control he could get, so we had him evaluated at Maeve's psychologist's office. Long story short he more than likely has ADD/ADHD but because of his major delays in speech and a few other things they are not giving an official diagnosis yet as those things can also indicate Pervasive Developmental Disorder, or Asperger's. The psychologist is holding off on the diagnosis until he's completed his year of speech therapy but in the mean time he will be starting ABA therapy.
I started to notice a few similar things with Rudy's behavior so I had him evaluated for OT and ST as well. And even though he is not as delayed as Maeve and Tripp are, because he is the baby and the people he plays with and emulates the most are Maeve and Tripp, we've gone ahead and put him in therapy as well.
Then I noticed Bella exhibiting some sensory issues and a tongue thrust (a speech thing) so I went ahead to have her evaluated... basically I now have 4 children who attend occupational therapy and speech therapy each week.
One of their main issues is sensory processing disorder which basically is a neurological condition that makes them process sensory input in a different manner. Some times they are over sensitive to sounds, sights, or textures... even emotions (in Twilight world Jasper would probably have SPD), other times they need more stimulation than the average person and seek out certain sounds, textures, or sights. Another major factor is coordination. There can be problems with sending signals through the brain that can cause clumsiness. This is important... especially when you consider it is genetic.
Anyway I feel like we have a new lease on life through therapy. The kids are all doing amazingly well and best of all, answers for me are popping up out of nowhere. Normally people with SPD are introverts, but about a third of the time they can be an extrovert... like me. After speaking with the OT I started to realize I do many of the same things and they affect my life as much as they do the kids. For instance I have to wear ear plugs if the dishwasher, washing machine, and music are all going at the same time. It makes me anxious and feel like my heart is going to pound out of my chest.
You may have also noticed how clumsy I am. Turns out thy kids have inherited this from me. The best news is even I can get a handle on much of this. It's been recommended that we get a trampoline and the kids and I jump on it everyday to help with becoming more aware of where our bodies are in relation to other objects in our environments.
When speaking to Danny I could see the light bulb going off and him connecting all of the little dots. It even explains my hypersensitivity to pain. He agreed with the occupational therapist and now things like me freaking out when all four kids are talking to me at once makes a lot more sense to him. It doesn't make it right, but at least we now understand and I am able to preempt it.
So this is taking a long time to explain, and I'm very tired, but anyone who has known me a long time can do a little search about sensory processing disorder or sensory integration dysfunction and learn more about it. I'm hopeful that one day we can all live a bit more normal, happier, lives, with less stress.
With Maeve's extreme anxiety we decided it would be best to have Tripp there with her initially... her therapist recommended that we have him evaluated as well. Turns out he definitely needed speech and also needed occupational therapy as well. Then I started noticing how hyper and out of control he could get, so we had him evaluated at Maeve's psychologist's office. Long story short he more than likely has ADD/ADHD but because of his major delays in speech and a few other things they are not giving an official diagnosis yet as those things can also indicate Pervasive Developmental Disorder, or Asperger's. The psychologist is holding off on the diagnosis until he's completed his year of speech therapy but in the mean time he will be starting ABA therapy.
I started to notice a few similar things with Rudy's behavior so I had him evaluated for OT and ST as well. And even though he is not as delayed as Maeve and Tripp are, because he is the baby and the people he plays with and emulates the most are Maeve and Tripp, we've gone ahead and put him in therapy as well.
Then I noticed Bella exhibiting some sensory issues and a tongue thrust (a speech thing) so I went ahead to have her evaluated... basically I now have 4 children who attend occupational therapy and speech therapy each week.
One of their main issues is sensory processing disorder which basically is a neurological condition that makes them process sensory input in a different manner. Some times they are over sensitive to sounds, sights, or textures... even emotions (in Twilight world Jasper would probably have SPD), other times they need more stimulation than the average person and seek out certain sounds, textures, or sights. Another major factor is coordination. There can be problems with sending signals through the brain that can cause clumsiness. This is important... especially when you consider it is genetic.
Anyway I feel like we have a new lease on life through therapy. The kids are all doing amazingly well and best of all, answers for me are popping up out of nowhere. Normally people with SPD are introverts, but about a third of the time they can be an extrovert... like me. After speaking with the OT I started to realize I do many of the same things and they affect my life as much as they do the kids. For instance I have to wear ear plugs if the dishwasher, washing machine, and music are all going at the same time. It makes me anxious and feel like my heart is going to pound out of my chest.
You may have also noticed how clumsy I am. Turns out thy kids have inherited this from me. The best news is even I can get a handle on much of this. It's been recommended that we get a trampoline and the kids and I jump on it everyday to help with becoming more aware of where our bodies are in relation to other objects in our environments.
When speaking to Danny I could see the light bulb going off and him connecting all of the little dots. It even explains my hypersensitivity to pain. He agreed with the occupational therapist and now things like me freaking out when all four kids are talking to me at once makes a lot more sense to him. It doesn't make it right, but at least we now understand and I am able to preempt it.
So this is taking a long time to explain, and I'm very tired, but anyone who has known me a long time can do a little search about sensory processing disorder or sensory integration dysfunction and learn more about it. I'm hopeful that one day we can all live a bit more normal, happier, lives, with less stress.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
